yea. thinking about it more...Garden State. great film.
I kinda hit me. I've thought, and told with some people, that I don't feel like I have a home sometimes. Somewhere in the past three full years of college, my house in Springfield stopped becoming home. And I've bounced around apartments the past 3 years, although I do really like my new one. Maybe I like it because it might be my new "home"...?
Regardless, home is where the heart is. I guess the closest thing that makes that true is taf. Too bad it's only 1/52 of a year though. But it could be somewhere else. Within special people. Maybe. But I guess either way, I don't have a 100% solid home. I need a home.
Pardon my melodrama. I'm getting annoyed at it. I guess its just my mood lately.
A lot to do in the next few days.
Don't wake me, I plan on sleeping in.
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Garden State. Good movie. Quite good actually. maybe...refreshing even?
I think I was actually impressed by someones acting ability for the first time tonight. I don't recall sitting in a movie and thinking "dang, she can act." Good job Natalie Portman. It doesnt hurt that you have a legit natural beauty/gorgeousness about you. But yea, I am impressed.
Ranee busted out the JH robot sequence of the swing choir in public tonight in Chicago. She says it was awesome. Props for her.
The Postal Service - Such Great Heights (aka the 1st song in the slideshow)
The Postal Service - Sleeping In
Jars of Clay - Love Song for a Savior
Damien Rice - Cannonball
And these Kings of Conveniance guys seem pretty solid.
TASC Shaved Ice tomorrow, 3pm, in Allen. Come one, come all.
oh yea. Bryan Vince and Harmony too.
*edit*
So hah. I'm looking for pictures of bah tzang online. I go to google and search for "Bah tzang". Two of the first five results? Annie Chieu and Emily Huang's xanga/blog, with Annie being first overall. har har har. Again, I am impressed.
*edit 2*
ok so this is getting ridiculous. ten minutes later, I use Google Images to find a picture of bah-tzang. And what do i get? a picture from....Harmony's xanga.
...
school has started. oh what a joy.
classes can be good this semester though, if i let them be. one of them requires me to be part of a team in a class setting. i shall apply TAF skills here...i hope.
bah. school.
but it WAS a good night. yes, yes it was. but i will say no more.
lunch with erika on friday. booyah.
mood of the day: le poop
blah blah blah, blah blah blah blah, blah blah.
sooo...
my internet is ridiculously whack. it goes in and out. im going to call and yell at my service providers.
material possessions are really of no real value in this world. sure they might make you a little happy (i do heart my laptop and wireless internet) and make people think your a little cooler ("whoa, a laptop Jon!"), but in the end, theres something else we all want and need. and when you need it and want it but cant get it? well then, life is like a box of chocolates, a lot of little brown pieces that arent really chocolate, but poop...wait no no, crap, crap is a better word.
i still want my freaking camera back though. and yes, i am blessed with a lot. i just wish it was other things. silly human, always wanting more.
so ill try to end on a happier note. Z and Juliana, and maybe Howa, are coming to visit UIUC! yea!
aaannnddd...i want to sleep forever. yes. forever. I asked grace to punch me in the face. hard. she says shes going to do it tomorrow. im looking forward to it.
apologies if i depressed you with this.
and now i hibernate. and think nothing of all of this please.
So its the TAF post.
Well well. TAF 2004. In the twelve total years that I have attended TAF, I can honestly say that this was my personal best one. I don't know if I should call it "amazing" or use other choice words to describe it, even though it might have been. I think this year was my best because YOU all describe it as "amazing" and as "my best year". All of the hard work paid off. I feel a sense of accomplishment due to the campers' willingness to open up and let us impact them. Without the campers spirit (and energy), I would really be nothing. Thank YOU all, for everything you have done.
I'm not sure what else there is to say about this. I met a lot of new people, got closer to new people...but also...got farther from old people too. Too bad the week isnt longer so I can play with friends in other programs eh?
What took me so long to get to this was because my job I guess, isnt really done. But it isnt done for you either. From Juniors to Youth, we all learned about our ethics and our values.
How will YOU apply it to your real world now?
That's the most important thing. Sometimes in all of our euphoria over TAF and "taflove", we forget (I forget to) that what we are taught at TAF is something to use for the rest of our lives, in our REAL lives. Not only in our TAF lives.
And there are still some TAFers, and definitly the majority of people who don't go to TAF, that don't what it's all about because no one has shared it with them, it being...
Openness, acceptance, unconditional love
It's been my challenge to myself for the past two years to spread them everywhere. I hope you challenge yourself to it also. You might succeed, you might fail, you might forget, but it is important that you try. And if you DO succeed, I assure you the rewards are great.
Acceptance
I think a lot of us forget it. It's like the middle child of the three, but its just as important as the others. There is simliarity with yourself in the quiet kid in the corner, in the gothic kid walking around, the country kid sitting next to you. We're all human. We all have something beautiful.
I'd also like to take this time to thank everyone again. My staff, Junior staff, Youth Staff, the Officers, and the Campers. Every single freaking one of you. From the youngest Junior (Nathan?) to co-JH PD Christine to President Huang and other board members who started making the impacts that you and I still feel today, thank you.
And yes, I reiterate, the TAF week may be over, but we're all still here for you. Most of you know you can contact me any time if you want to talk. Same for any of the other JH counselors, and for the other program's staffs as well. We're all here for you.
The little quote seems to have caught on, "It not just a foundation, it's a family."
Just remember everyone at TAF is part of the family ok?
And once again,
“We should all strive to be who we are at TAF back home, in our "real world". Be as happy, open, loving and caring as you are at TAF. Strive to be the forever TAFer, and if you do all of this, you accomplish the goals of TAF. All you need to do is love, and you'll impact mankind in a unique and compassionate way. Break down your walls, eliminate the barriers, just open up and it will come.”
Peace up, God bless, take care, I'll see y'all soon.
tafLove
yea yea, the taf post is still coming. im still wrapping things up.
on a side note. Yes, Moulin Rouge is correct.
The greatest thing you'll ever know it just to love and be loved in return
BUT.
To love and NOT be loved in return...well thats just straight up drop kick you in the gut, tear out your heart and torture your mind SUCKY.
Yes. Hmm. That was kind of depressing. I hope you all have a good day!
i saw kelsey chappel today for the first time in...7 years? She moved to New Mexico after freshman year. of high school. we were once little buddies in the sandbox. Two decades later, it is the 21st century. she wrote her email address down for me on a napkin. har har.
in the words of mr dave matthews, "it hurt not much when you're around."
but you're not around. and it hurts. oh yes it does. i forgot what else i wanted to say. meh.
and dont fret. I'll post all about that taiwanese thing i went to last week soon enough. you know i love you all.