JONIZZLE

Just to get this off my chest.

Chien Ming Wang.

Good pitcher. Taiwanese. Great. But you know what? I was a Cubs fan since I was six years old. Being a Cubs fan was part of my identity before anything else. That includes calling myself Taiwanese American. I have embraced my Cubs a full decade longer than I have embrace Taiwan. So, this is why despite being very proud of my Taiwanese heritage, I do not cheer for Chien Ming Wang.

Or maybe I am just tired of the Yankees. I'm starting to respect Jeter a lot, and I hope A-Rod gets traded to the Cubs. But it's still the Yankees. I'm tired of them. Whatever.

Go Cubs.

And you know what? Wang really is the pride of Taiwan right now. Eeeeverybody loves him. Even my mom wants to watch him pitch and cheer for him and the Yankees. You see how me, being a serious baseball fan with real loyalty to one team, finds that disturbing? All y'all xanga-ing about Wang, blah blah blah. Leave me alone.

And you know whats worse? Since he IS the pride of Taiwan, everyone in Taiwan is a Yankee fan. This just gives the Yankees more revenue! I mean, think about it. Taiwan has the 17th largest GDP in the World. THE SEVENTEENTH LARGEST ECONOMY IN THE WORLD FULLY SUPPORTS THIS ONE PITCHER AND HIS TEAM! That's horrible for the rest of baseball. Perhaps incredibly shrewd on the part of Brian Cashman, but oh man. That is just more money for the richest. If they marketed well enough in Taiwan, the Yankees could sign Zito, keep A-Rod on the bench as a $20 million pinch hitter, draft a standing army, and purchase the Dominican Republic (much cheaper at 69th in GDP) and then own every baseball player to come out of that island for the next twelve generations.

Damn Yankees.